Thursday, June 28, 2007

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Who Loves Ya, Baby?

Some things make life worth living. This music video is one of them. Telly Savalas singing (and I use that word loosely) If. If this doesn't fill you with joy, you are dead inside:

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Through The Looking Glass

It occurs to me that, after many years of indulging me and my inane chatter, some of you out there have no idea what I look like. Let me help you fill in some gaps.

An awful lot of people tell me I look like this:

Which is flattering. It happens less now than it used to, which may be attributed to my slowly advancing years. However, as time passes, I suspect that most people don’t actually mean that anymore. They mean this:

Bastards. Personally, I prefer this comparison:

Can you dig it? I knew that you could!

Occasionally, and this has happened more often than you would think, I have been compared to this:

This is usually followed by a brutal beating. And that ends today’s brief foray into Google Image Search Photofit Fun.

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

No Subject Line Can Prepare You For The Horror

This is the new logo for the London 2012 Olympic Games. It cost £400,000.

Shit, isn’t it?

Looking directly at it gives me a piercing headache just behind my eyeballs. It looks like the aftermath of a Lisa Simpson chainsaw attack. It looks like someone’s granddad’s idea of cool. Because Granddad does so love that new hippity-hop sound.

Please feel free to add more insults and withering criticism in the comments section as you see fit, because ugly is in the eye of the beholder.

Friday, June 01, 2007

And The Tweet Goes On

Short Sharp Stabs Are GO!

George “drool-on-his-chin-and-the-devil-in-his-eyes” Bush is still the world’s most unbelievably Evil Bastard. Is no-one willing to challenge him for the crown of King of the Shits?

Be Kind, Rewind has the potential to be the finest piece of cinematic confectionary we can hope to consume in 2008.

As feared, I have become obsessed with Twitter. Have you seen me twittering yet? You should. It’s like this, only shorter. Less filling, but with the same great taste. And to all of my lovely friends out there who don’t like to go down on the blogosphere and get all messy with your hungry lips and roving tongue, now you have no excuse! Go forth and twitter! It will give me something else to read. And I can never have too many things to read.

And in the words of C.J. Cregg: "That's a full lid!"